Thursday, September 24, 2009

Where are we going, you ask?

Before I enter the world of "where are we going", I wanted to clarify....we are leaving our house for now for about 6-7 months....we are NOT completely moving ALL of our belongings. Our things will remain in the home with lots of friendly visitors to keep an eye on everything...okay....sooo....

We are trying to stay clear of concrete plans and times so that we don't disappoint anyone or put pressure on ourselves, as well as to leave an out in case our RV has issues. We do have a few points on the itinerary that we intend to pass through before we land in Chapel Hill, NC on 10/23 for a wedding weekend. When we leave Monday morning, we will be heading towards Jeff's old boarding school where he spent less than a year, but a very valuable portion of a year...Hello Scattergood Friends! We then will go to Akron, Ohio to visit Dr. Bob's friends and meet up with some Friends of Bill W. We are then heading off to Greenville, Maine to visit Jeff's mom and sister. Then heading south, we will most likely hit Rhode Island and New Jersey (more of Jeff's family). Then we will drive down to Chapel Hill, NC for Molly's wedding and pre-wedding party. After that, our goal is to stay warm, but we have no time constraints. South Carolina sounds nice and Florida is probably our winter destination.

I imagine I am going to get quite busy in the next few days, but if I get a chance I will write a post before the laptop goes in the RV.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Moving out...

I am ready to go.....finally ready on all counts....!! I have a checklist; I am checking in twice, making sure what's important. We were supposed to move out before the first snowflake fell from the sky. So far it has snowed about 3-4 times before the first day of fall...WHAT??!!?! We really had a can laugh! I can take it! The good news is that the day is getting thisclose and I can feel it! I don't think we are going to leave the house this weekend unless it is a meeting we are willing to leave our checklist for! I am already preparing my good byes--So long snow, so long fave "sex and the city coat" (thanks Sarah for taking good care of it this winter)! The list goes on....So long Comcast! So long hot tub! So long incredibly massaging hot hot shower, my favorite shower I have ever lived with...bye bye!! I'll let you know when we really are on the road because I will be levitating with excitement! See you then! I am glad I have already said good bye (for now, not forever) to my friends and family here in Colorado (Tom, Mary, Beth, etc)......I can't wait to make new friends....Make new friends, keep the old...dear G-d, let me sign off now........see ya soon!

Saturday, September 19, 2009


We had a party today and it was great to see all the people that showed up after all that preparation. It helps me get over my denial. The denial revolved around my whereabouts next weekend- I won't be in Golden! If we have a going away party, that means we actually ARE Going away............deep breath....okay...going away means outside of my comfort zone. Going away means leaving my area code. Going away means GOING AWAY. If I can just stay in the moment, I will actually be able to get everything done because I will NOT be paralyzed by the fear of leaving everything I know. That makes to practice in the moment. I will let you know that works for me.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

It's getting really real, isn't it?

I am realizing that the big day is MUCHCLOSER than it appears in my head images in the driver's side mirror. Wow! I can't even begin to imagine how much I am going to miss PPC though I didn't know a single member of the fellowship 100 days ago....strange. I am starting to really get how much I am going to miss my friends in Colorado. It's going to be weird that I can't just see them when ever I want, but I am really glad I had the opportunity to be more accessible to a lot of people in these last eight months. I can't even believe it has been that long. I got this new laptop in January, but only just started to really make headway with this blog in the writing arena...not working since January has been an amazing self-discovery of what I really wanted to focus & writing. Now I am going to be doing both and I am really excited....

Right now, I am recovering from a horrid Scrabble loss. I suffered from an embarrassing display of sportsmanship (or lack thereof). Jeff thinks my "sore loser" mentality relates to my morals...the nerve. He's just giving me a hard time-he does not lose that much more gracefully than I. It drains my energy nonetheless and I will reserve my thoughts on the enlightening game of scrabble for another post. It should suffice to say that anyone that puts down TINSLES deserves to be challenged and subsequently blocked from further BINGOS.....

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Two weeks to go and ???

Wow! I am starting to really think about my RV checklist. It's not like the stranded island/three things to bring game, but it's limited space to share with Jeff, Sadie, Max & to prioritize the inventory?!

Besides my clothes and essential toiletries which are non-negotiable (in my not so humble opinion), I have to figure out how to ration space for our anniversary version Scrabble game (and OSPD), books, CDs and DVDs. Then there are the hobbies, books, etc for Jeff and toys for the dogs. What to do?! Our tangible tools for recovery are first priority, but I am glad we can somewhat share those! I snagged the Grapevine (the new one with the big stone EGO that needs to be smashed on the front cover... that one). I can imagine several other Daily Meditation books that will save the (insane and uncertain) day, so those are a given....I read daily, so I know I will only have limited space for the many books on my shelf I have not yet read...If any of you have any MUST READ recommendations, let me know! My Big Book will not get left way, so don't worry!

Cooking is going to be a challenge if we want to eat anything other than Marie Callender's Chicken Pot Pie & Kraft Macaroni and Cheese (imitations don't suffice here). Jeff makes fabulous breakfasts, so I am in charge of lunch/dinner. I am going to have to smuggle in some really useful recipe cards and recipes in cookbooks (that don't count against my regular book inventory) that don't involve an oven....just a stove top /range(gas),microwave/convection oven, and a refrigerator/freezer. If those can be used for a tasty non-pork, non-fish recipe that meets my other parameters (some of you know what that involves), please let me know!

A special arrangement of my favorite jeans, tops and shoes will make it in the RV NO MATTER WHAT !! I can't explain it, but some of these things give me certain joy. Yes, I can be righteous too and say that being happy, joyous and free refers to my spiritual life, but wearing my favorite pairs of jeans is a very happy, joyous and liberating feeling. So yes, I will bring along my Sevens, Hudsons & Lucky Brand Jeans. Can't live with out them! Does this contradict the spiritual books mentioned in the first part of my post? I think not. The ease and comfort that comes with wearing a good pair of jeans will not lead me to my old lifestyle....I always need my HP....and I always need to get dressed before I open the RV door. I have remained sober with or with out my jeans...but not with out my HP (I will just say G-d from now on)...I am Jewish and we aren't supposed to actually spell it out...I am sure you can figure out what I am referring to in any posts that follow.

Selecting our mobile music collection will not be hard- Jeff and I pretty much agree on everything. So as we head off on the Road to Nowhere (Talking Heads is an integral part of our collection), we will enjoy our tunes. DVDs are another story: while I would like the whole series collection of Sex and the City, I think he would be more interested in Hill Street Blues or NYPD Blue (not that I wouldn't, but not my first priority). I would love to get more Nip/Tuck-why does that have to be so expensive?? Our Sopranos series collection is a given. After all, one of our wedding songs comes from the Sopranos soundtrack, not to mention some incredible performances by Edie Falco, Gandolfini, Drea de Mateo, etc...

It's so cold and rainy today, we could start a fire in our living room. Earlier, the Denver Mattress people delivered our RV's new QUEEN SIZE mattress (don't ask what happened to our last queen size mattress, but if you are wondering what to buy me for Christmas/Chanukah, do NOT buy me a pillow top mattress, especially if it's smaller than a queen) .....

See you LOCALS next weekend for the going away party!!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Not yet on the road, but miles away in my mind...

I am so excited at the idea of RV living, I am already living there in my head. My thoughts are currently at where we are going to camp/stay for Molly's wedding. I hope the RV is long enough and this and that. Today I called the hotel where Mom got us a room to chill for a few days during our weekend in Chapel Hill, NC and they are happy to accomodate our RV. I reported this to Jeff who accurately pointed out "we haven't even left mile at a time babe...."...Yeah, right...I am thinking about how it will be nice to get a night's rest in a hotel with a big bath and Jeff has pointed out I am still living at home. We don't even leave for a few weeks!
There are things I have already planned weeks in advance that aren't really crucial for the RV's readiness, per se, but more my state of mind: how many pairs of my favorite jeans, kitchen tools, how many flip flops and shoes will fit, and very importantly (in a close environment) how many vials of perfume and toiletries will fit in the allotted space (next to his fishing gear, RV tools, etc)....Ahhhh transitioning from Alyssa's standard maintenance to RV maintenance will be an adjustment for sure. Don't get me wrong....I am fully aware of what I will leave behind and choose what is truly important to warrant RV status. I am genuinely relieved that I have an excuse to minimize my life (something I have worked on for the last seven months as I merged my condo's belongings into my house and piles of Goodwill donations).
I am miles away in my head, except for one area that will require at least a few blog entries on its very own. I am in denial, somewhat of this area--I am firmly planted in Colorado with my friends (in and out of recovery/program) and I admit I haven't really come to grips that when I am REALLY miles away, I won't be available for a quick lunch at CPK (with Sarah) or Il Vicino (with Shireen) or anywhere else with anyone else for that matter. I certainly am not addressing the fact that I won't get to spend my Mondays with Lidiya for a long time....okay...I need to stop for now.. I am definitely in denial.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

How to fall in love with a puggle

I was a cat owner. I was the owner of multiple cats. I am pretty sure now that was a mistake. I felt that when I realized that I was not the best caretaker in that darker period of my life, that I would never be fit to have pets ever again. In the next years that followed, I turned my life around and in that process, returned the cats to a shelter. A year later, I made serious and intentional amends to the animal shelter. That was then, this is now.
After a little time and a lot more faith, I considered getting a dog. I researched the most appropriate dog for my size condo and came up with pug or English bulldog.I enlisted myself on rescue breed waiting lists. I started looking on websites and found a dog that happened to be at a rescue shelter. I called them as soon as they opened on the Friday right before Memorial day 2008.
I went right down to the shelter and met a dog that was more puggle than pug. The man from the shelter deposited an adorable puggle into my cubicle and the puppy proceeded to immediately pee right in the middle of our assigned little box. The man kindly cleaned the mess up and directed us to the next cubicle-and there it happened. This dog licked me constantly and deposited tan fur on my black teeshirt for the next 45 minutes. The man came back and asked me "what do you think?". I told him I fell in love. I fell deeply in love with Max, the puggle. I spent 10-15 minutes completing paperwork and made a plan to pick up my new puppy after Memorial day. Tuesday he was to undergo his neuter surgery and I was to pick him up Tuesday afternoon. I immediately contacted my friend Shireen who generously donated a portion of her Saturday to help me prepare for my newest pet.
Saturday, Shireen instructed me to get things for Max I had not even thought of as well as the obvious puppy paraphenalia: poop bags, Kongs (ultimate toy), healthy food (yes, dogs have junk food too, apparently) and a kennel (to crate train-Max came to love this-no torture intended or endured). She helped me pick out the things that would bring Max ultimate comfort. Thanks Shireen!!
I picked up Max and a three day supply of carprofen for his pain/discomfort and headed home. That night and endless (well, okay, about a week) nights after, Max cried and cried. I doubted if I was doing the right thing. I continued to ask my dog owner friends if I was even doing this pet thing right; they assured me I was. Even when the dog humped his bed in the middle of my bookclub, I loved my Max. Even when he chewed up my Grandma's afghan blanket, I loved the puggle. Much to my surprise, the vet told me I may have gotten a puppy instead of a dog "around 1 year old" as advertised. Longer to love Max, I figured.
Now, more than a year later, Max does not fail to give me unconditional support, love, neverending licks and tons of nudges in the right direction. It's husband has fallen in love with him too!